Monday, July 31, 2006

Mommies don't get sick

As I've shouldered the responsiblity of caring for my 2 baby girls and 1 baby husband last week while they all fought off nasty colds and pink eye, I've comforted myself with the fact that mommies don't get sick. Afterall, who would be there to care for the babies?

Somehow I missed the memo.

I woke up this morning with my eyes crusted shut, my throat raging, a stuffy nose, and general malaise. I hate being sick, but it especially sucks when I can't just lie in bed and sleep it away. Or take Nyquil. I really miss Nyquil. I've been pregnant and/or breast feeding since the middle of 2003. Thats 3 years without Nyquil. {{SIGH}} I really wish putting myself into a drug-induced oblivion and sleeping the sickness away. Instead, I'm stuck at work avoiding work as I surf the 'net.

Deleloping a fear of the dark

In my younger years I loved the dark. Don't get me wrong, I had plenty of nights when I slept with the light on after reading Stephen King into the wee hours. But, as a young adult I loved being outside in the cover of darkness. I loved the comfortable feel of it. It isn't as if I was (usually) out being mischevious. I just liked being outside in the dark.

Lately though, I've develped a fear of the dark. The dark is where bad people live - people who may want to harm my babies. I feel unsafe being out at night - even if its just to run over to the clubhouse to workout. I don't like how it makes me feel.

Its funny what becomming a mommy has done to me. I worry about the silliest things. I mean, what are the chances that something is going to happen in my safe, white bread community?

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Teaching a 2 year old

In light of recent tragedies involving small children, I've decided to teach Gracelin a few things to help her out in the event that something does happen. I think some of it is starting sink in. I quizzed her last night, and here's how our conversation went:

mommy: whats your name
G: Gracie H . . .
mommy: what's your mommy's name
G: Christie H. . . .
mommy: what's your daddy's name
G: Ben H . . .
mommy: how old are you
G: 2 (giggles)
mommy: where do you live
G: San Diego


Oh well - we'll have to work on the address. I've taught her the street name, but for some reason she is obsessed with San Diego and we've never even been there. I think I'd better save 911 for another day too. She's still doing great for 2 years and 3 months.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Bryn is 5 months old!

Brynlee is such a bright and beautiful girl. She has the happiest smile and brightest eyes. She's such a lover - she loves to smile, squeal and cuddle. For 5 months old, she is such a social butterfly, and knows how to make people smile. She also loves her big sister - no one can make Bryn laugh like G can. They're so sweet together.

Brynlee is sitting up now. She does really well and can stay up for a long time. She also loves to be on her tummy, and will rock back and forth. I think she's close to crawling. She scoots all around to find toys she wants to play with. Her favorite things right now are balls. Daddy's convinced she's going to be a little athlete.

Bryn also got her first tooth this weekend. OTher than drooling excessive amounts and wanting to chew on everything, she's really had no other symptoms. It seems I've been blessed with easy teethers. (KNOCK on wood!!)

She also loves solids. Yesterday I let her lick a pear I was eating, and she was in heaven. That was the first fruit she's ever tried, but she loves when I mash her some fresh peas to eat. Her favorite so far though are sweet potatoes. YUMMY! Even rice cearal though is a big hit, although I've noticed as she's tried more foods she likes the cereal less.

95% of the time Bryn is the happiest baby on the block. The other 5% though, WATCH OUT. She's got red-headed temperment. LOL She can escallate very quickly too, so we've learned to meet her needs quickly. As long as we do though, she's an angel.

She's getting prettier by the day too. Her hair is the color of a shiny new penny, and its like thick peach fuzz all over the top of her round head. She's got rosy lips and a creamy, white skin. She looks like a baby doll. And she's so round and squisy - she's got dimples everywhere. She just look like a baby should look. I love her so much.

Monday, July 17, 2006

More than you ever wanted to know about my girls

Is it normal for mommies to have recurrent bad dreams about their babies? I get them a lot, and usually they involve one of my children dying. Morbid I know, but the dreams are so real and disturbing that they occupy much of my though. Lately I’ve been having one where one of my girls falls – usually off of a 1000-foot cliff in Southern Utah’s red rock country. Its so vivid and real that I don’t think we’ll ever be taking a family vacation anywhere in the vicinity of 1000-foot cliffs. I’ve never really talked about these nightmares with anyone else, although I would assume it’s fairly normal for a mother to have fears of losing a child. My girls are so precious to me: I can’t bear the though of losing one. I don’t know how parents go on who lose a child.

Today though, I want to post all about my beautiful babies.

I can’t believe my Brynlee Boo will be 5 months old on Thursday. She is growing way too fast. Part of me is really sad to lose the newborn, but I am excited too for the curious, big girl she is becoming. I’m excited though for the day when she is old enough to play with her big sister – there is such a bond there. Whenever Bryn is sad or fussy, I’ll ask Gracelin to sing to her or make her laugh. It works every time. No one can elicit a smile or belly laugh from the baby like Sister can. They have such a special closeness.

Brynlee is rolling like crazy. Most babies roll tummy to back, and hate tummy time. Not my little Boo – she’s all about tummy time. As soon as her back hits the blankie, she’s rolling over her left side to hang out. She’s starting to push up too onto her knees and rock (did I mention she’s not yet 5 months old?) She’s so strong and determined.

Brynlee is also very alert. She knows exactly what is going on in the house at all times. It makes for a baby that is very often difficult to get to sleep and eat. She’ll only nurse when she’s absolutely starving (which you’d never guess by looking at her) and sleep is very elusive. Daytime naps are few and far between and it makes it hard to stick to a schedule; however by night time, she crashes and sleeps great. She does love solid foods though – its like she wants to be big, and she just loves eating like a big girl. Even rice cereal is a huge hit. She’ll squeal and kick her feet as soon as she knows its meal time. And she has to sit on my lap while I eat – she reached for my plate and quite a few times has grabbed a handful of my food.

Gracelin is a big and bright 2 year old. I can’t believe she’s so grown up. She is a very mature 2 (its like she’s 2, going on 15). She is fully conversational, and sometimes amazes me with the things she comprehends. Right now she is really interested in family relationships. Last night my sister Jen and her husband Tyler were over for dinner. Gracelin said to me that Jen is a wife and Tyler is a husband. LOL Its so funny the things that she thinks about.

She’s starting to recognize letters, and loves finding them. This morning, she puked all over herself in the car (still not over the carsickness, UGH) and since we were 4 blocks from daycare I decided to just run to WalMart and pick up a new outfit. As we were walking in, Gracelin pointed to a sign overhead and said “look Mommy, it’s a letter ‘A’”. And she was right. Yesterday she asked me what my favorite song is. I don’t remember what I even told her, but when I asked her favorite song, she proudly told me “it’s the A, B, C song Mommy”. And then she proceeded to sing it 100 times.

She’s starting to count too, and can get all the way to 13 before she starts getting mixed up. She was counting in the car today on the way to daycare (before the carsick episode) and after 13, said “16 . . . 19 . . .. Christie-teen” and then giggled at her clever self.

She is a stinker though about some things. She is so very stubborn. Eating is quite a challenge since she only has about 5 foods she’ll tolerate. This morning she actually had a glass of fortified orange juice and whole-wheat toast (best breakfast in ages) but yesterday she ate a taquito. She used to eat so well, so I’m hoping this is just a phase, but its lasted for months and is getting worse. There is not one fruit nor one vegetable she’ll tolerate. She’ll try them too, but will spit everything out. She does drink that expensive orange juice for kids and we give her vitamins.

Sleep has become a challenge too. She used to sleep great, but I think she’s begun having nightmares and gets afraid of the dark. Lately she cannot fall asleep unless mommy or daddy is in bed with her. Luckily she’s in a queen so its comfortable. She frequently wakes in the middle of the night too, and we have to go lay with her. I’ve debated letting her CIO, but really I don’t mind the cuddle times. Besides, (as Dr Sears said) she’s not going to come home from the prom and want to sleep with mommy. This phase will likely be over soon enough and I’ll long for her to want to cuddle again. I’d better just enjoy it while it lasts.

Ahhh – my little girls are perfect. I’d better stop myself here, or I’d ramble forever.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Could my family be any cuter?

This was actually taken on Memorial Day, over 6 weeks ago. I need to update. We were at the Great Salt Lake, but Gracelin thought we were in San Diego - any large bodies of water are San Diego. We're leaving for Jackson, WY in a few minutes, and I'll post more then.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Mulling over my defection

I have been journalling over at TLOL for a long time - I think I started in 2002. I've had this blog for a long time as well; however it has not been my love. I like the TLOL community so much as well as the format, and I've found myself posting there instead of here. Besides, it seemed silly to have a blog and a journal. I've got a lot invested at TLOL - over 300 entries that take me from the young DINK to the mommy of 2 that I am now. But lately, the majority of my "friends" over there have moved on, and while there are plenty of others there that I frequently read, I miss so many of the people I originally met there.

So, I'm considering resurrecting my blog.

Am I jumping on the blogging bandwagon? Maybe.

I just worry that I don't have time to keep up a blog and keep up on TLOL. There are many over there that I check on frequently. But, I suppose that I should be most concerned with preserving my own thoughts and feelings instead of being a "cyber voyeur".


What to do?

Honestly, I'm not as addicted to TLOL as I once was. Perhaps its simply that I don't have the time. With 2 kids and 2 jobs, I barely have time to think some days, let alone "play" on the computer.

There's always the fear too that no one will read. How pathetic am I that my fear of not being liked by a bunch of people I've never met is a driving factor in my decision.