Tuesday, July 29, 2008

The barfs

In the continuing tradition of gross-out stories, here's another one:

Growing up in Kentucky, my family belonged to a swim club. It really wasn't as exclusive as it sounds, but there were no public pools in the area. So if we wanted to take swim lessons and have a place to swim, it was either the swim club or the YMCA. So, we opted for the swim club. We pretty much spent every single day at the pool, and occasionally would take friends. Since our friends weren't members, we would have to sign them in at the front desk. Then with all the technology of 1986, they would call the teenager at the back to let him know the name of our guest. We'd walk around to the back, and by the time we got there, the guests' names would be on the log.

On one particular day, my sister took her friend who we shall call Suzie Barth. (The Suzie is obviously made up, but Barth was her real last name.) We signed her in at the front, and walked around back. The boy at the desk asked her what her last name was.

Suzie: Barth
Boy at desk: Did you say "BARF??"
S: No, Barth
BOD: BARF? I don't see a Barf here
S: (getting a bit annoyed) No, Barth. B-A-R-T-H
BOD: Oh, Bar-TH. Here you are

For some reason I still find that day from over 20 years ago incredibly hilarious, but can't help but to think that maybe that should be my last name - because, you see, my family throws up (pukes, vomits, BARFS) more than any other family that I know.

My kids puke a lot - but don't most kids? But I vomit a lot too. When I was pregnant with both babies, I had hyperemesis, and pretty much threw up every single day of my pregnancies. Thats a lot of vomit. But even when I'm not pregnant, I'm fairly inclined to "blow chunks" more than the average adult. Even my husband gets in on the "fun". He lived for 2 years of his life in Siberia. He served an LDS mission there, and got really sick. The doctors are pretty sure he got radiation poisoning, but it still affects him. Without much warning, he can be seen running for the bathroom with his hand over his mouth.

Even our dear kitty is affected. She pukes at least twice a week. In fact, she left this lovely suprise for us just the other day - in my hubby's flip-flop no less:

Aren't you glad you read my blog!


Erin said...

I needed a good reason to skip breakfast this morning. Thanks for that!

Ruhiyyih Rose said...

LOL!!! I love that last line, "Aren't you glad that you read my blog?" hilarious! Well, so sorry about all of the pukey-ness, but it does make for a fun story! :) Hee.

Julia said...

I love that you take the time to take pics of the barf. I think that show true blog devotion and honesty.

I think I'm lucky because my kid(s) don't throw up very much. Of course when they are sick it can happen and every now and then Landon sticks his hands down his throat to see what will happen. But other than that, I think we have some stable stomachs. I didn't throw up once when I was pregnant and I was bummed because I ate a lot but still wanted to be the cute pregnant girl that stayed skinny. Oh well! I cry when I throw up anyway. SO probably a good thing.

Gina said...

Too funny, except for the fact that I had just put a big piece of meat in my mouth when I scrolled down to the pic!! Yummy!! Fun story!!

Anne Marie said...

Oh man, I HATE throwing up. A few weeks ago I came home from a meeting before church to pick up my family and found that Dallin had leaned over his bunk bed in the middle of the night and thrown up ALL OVER Luke (who had snuck into my bed later, bringing barf with him), and then gone back to sleep. I spent sacrament meeting at home cleaning dried barf off the blinds, windows, sheets, carpet, etc. etc. It was lovely.

Mindi said...

holy barfing, batman!!

that is alot of vomit goin' on over there--

your story about your friend's name made me laugh because i had a friend in middle school who's last name was barfuss. really.
she hated it.

The Monsen Fam said...

Oh..lol. I love the Cat vomit shoe! What a shot!

Lynita said...

That is so crazy! I read the title while I was on the phone with my dad, telling him how I was up puking in the middle of the night for no good reason the other night! I can't believe that even your cat pukes a lot... classic! I am sorry that you have to deal with that, it sucks!

carrie said...

OK...Gross. ;o) I actually throw up easily, too.... I threw up my entire pregnancies, and I just throw up sometimes....just like you said. It's a weird, weird thing. I'm so glad my kids haven't developed the same trait....so far. ha ha You're so funny to have taken a picture of it.

Misty said...

I think I might puke too! Either way, my mom really did have a best friend in HS with the last name barfit - poor girl!