Monday, April 28, 2008

This post has been brought to you by the word crotch

Things that I will be posting about soon:

Our amazingly fun trip to St George
The latest chapter in the daycare saga
The Salt Lake City marathon
Gracelin’s birthday this week

What I am going to be posting about today:

The word “crotch”

Ok – I’m only (sort of) kidding about that one. I just got a laugh out of some of the comments posted about my last blog regarding my use of the word “crotch”. Apparently one of my readers (who shall remain nameless) just loves that word, but her husband hates it. And it got me thinking about my own husband and his hatred of a few words: blouse, panties, and moist. I’m constantly trying to come up with sentences using those 3 words just to annoy him. Now I’m thinking that, just for kicks, I should start throwing the word crotch into the mix. I wonder if he hates that word too? The combinations of things I could say using all 4 words are mind-boggling. . .

I love to say big, fancy words that most people have no idea what they mean. Would you believe I correctly used the word curmudgeon in the proper context just last week without missing a beat? I also love to say things that shock people just a little bit. Nothing offensive or rude, but something that makes people stop and give me a second look. Like the word penis for example. I love to say penis.

I also have a few words that I hate:

Zit – ewww – I cringe even typing that word. I’ve had blemishes and pimples, but never zits. UGH. What a horrible word.

Rag (depending on the context) – my husband calls every washing utensil a “rag”, which drives me batty. Please don’t call my wash cloth (something I will be using on my face and other “intimate areas”) a rag. Rags are dirty.

Fart – maybe this one has derived from my mother, who also hates this word, and insisted we call them “rudy-toot-toots” as a child (I am so not kidding). I’m fine with toot, quiff, break wind, barking spider, pass gass, and even cut the cheese. But please don’t fart in my presence.

I’m sure there are other words that make me cringe – someone as anal-retentive as me must have other things that drive me crazy. But my sleep-deprived mind is lacking the ability to think right now. So, what about you? What words do you love/hate?


Stephanie F. said...

Oooh, I hate moist too! And supper, that's definitely a weird word.

Tiburon said...

Oh I will have to think about one for sure. I know there are some. Now that it is on my brain I will compile and list and get back to you :)

Julia said...

Okay dude...and I have to say dude, because that is what I do...

I'd rather hear the real F word than that other F word you mention in you list. I don't know what is wrong with me, but I just HATE HATE that stinky gross word.

I use Toot! It is still very gross. But it fits since I call my kid Toot-un-kamen because he is too much like his father. And that was more than you needed to know.

I also hate the word moist. YUCK. Panties is a cute word though. I used to hate the word package, but now I just think it is funny. That, along with NUTS. because nuts are hilariously delicious and gross. I love on CARS when Mater says "I'd give my left two lug nuts" haha. Okay I'm gross and need to stop typing.

Last thing....

Nike + rocks. i love it and so far Jeff has hogged it, but just told me that I am now allowed to use it.

Are you going to do the Race for the Cure in two weeks? I think me and Landon will.

You inspire me. Good luck with Daycare.

Kristine said...

I use foofernate in place of f-a-r-t, what do you think? People look at me weird, but I hate the word too :)

I hate panties. It sounds weird to me. They're underwear, no matter who you are.

Lindsay said...

I hate the word greasy - only when people pronounce it greazy *shudder*

Gina said...

Hey Christie...I hope you guys have a great time in St. George and I wish you the best luck with your daycare situation!! I can't think of a word so I'm going to have to think about it. I know that I hate to be called Mrs. Steinagel or Sister Steinagel...I have all my kids friends call me Gina or miss Gina...but that's not really a word now is it. I will really have to think hard about this one!!

Anne Marie said...

Ok, this is a great topic. I am with Julia on the f-word, except I can't even say the t word that rhymes with boot. I can't even type it. That is what my in-laws use, and I appreciate that they are censoring themselves for me, but it is still way too much. My kids have been instructed to say that they did a bad thing with their bum. It is usually in the form of tattling. Dallin: "Mom, Luke did a bad thing with his bum!" me: "Luke!" Luke, looking down at the ground: "Sorry, Mom." How's that for damaging your kids? The poor things when they actually get to the real world, but I just can't deal with it. I also hate the word that starts with a w and ends with art. For some reason I can not deal with it. Dallin actually has one on his toe right now and it is gross, but it will always be there because I can't bring myself to say the word to the doctor. I've tried, two years in a row, and I can't! And I also can't buy the medicne for it at the store because I don't want to touch the box. I think I need therapy. Crotch, however, is a classic. It is so vague, yet so specific. It is always appropriate and it will always hold a special place in my heart.

Ruhiyyih Rose said...

HI! Thanks for stopping by my blog! I came by yours this morning and read about your marathon! I was going to ask you how you got the Nike+ icon on your blog. I went onto my acct today to try to figure it out, but got lost :) go figure. :)

I love your writing! SO funny! Hee!

carrie said...

I am laughing SO hard right now....and it's MIDNIGHT. This post was just too funny. It's too late for me to go thru ALL the words I hate (ha ha)...'cause believe me, there are many.....BUT I will tell you a word I absolutely HATE with a passion. It is the word HUMP. Gross..... I don't mean it in the sense of a camel has a hump, either. DISGUSTING..... OK....there are a few other "bad words" I could write, but I don't want to corrupt your blog. I'll just stick to the one word for now. Have a great week!! :o)

Lynita said...

Ha ha ha! I love the word crotch! My favorite is when Kaitlyn says it, I know I shouldn't think it is funny, but I do! I can't stand the word "pop", I am sorry but until they start labeling soda, "pop" I refuse to recognize it as such! It makes me nuts when people ask if I have any "pop" or Coke! Why would I drink either Pepsi is the only cola worth drinking and "pop" doesn't actually exist unless it is SODA-POP!

Chelsea said...

It drives me crazy when people refer to rain as "moisture". It seems to be a Utah thing - Eric and I joke that people from the desert don't know what to call that wet stuff that falls from the sky. :D

Oh, and my mom insists to this day that "fart" is "the F word".

Omgirl said...

Oh sad! I wrote a funny comment on this and now it's not there. I guess I didn't do the word verification right.

My words were
(all words my mom made me use)
and "on the rag". I hate that phrase. LIke your period isn't bad enough that people have to call it that. Ick.