Monday, April 10, 2006

How do you know when you're done?

Two kids is a really nice round number. We have a 3 bedroom home. Our car fits 2 car seats really nice. There's two parents (thus one kid for each parent to take care of). The entire time I was pregnant with Brynlee, I was sure she was the last. I hate being pregnant so much, and really I'm not a healthy pregnant person.

But something happened once she was born. I'm not sure what has caused me to feel this way, but I have a nagging feeling that our family isn't complete. I feel that somehow there's another child for our family someday. Ben and I discussed it, and he's not entirely opposed to the idea. But, he wants to wait until both girls are potty trained until we try. He loves his girls, but I know he'd love a boy too. Ben's such a sports nut. He really needs a boy to pass that along to. Of course our girls can play ball with their daddy, but there's something about having a BOY to do those things with that I think every man wants.

Of couse, I can't put 3 kids into daycare. So, if we do have one more, I'd have to be a SAHM. (the ramifications of this extend well beyond the title to my blog). Obviously we need to make some financial changes before this happens as well.

Then, there's the factor of my age. I'll be 32 this year - which isn't ancient by any standards. But, I have this fantasy of being an empty-nester and being young enough to enjoy it. I suppose there's always the risk of Down's too the older I get.

Hmmmm. So much to consider.

Yesterday Gracelin said to me, "I love my family. They make me happy - my sister and my brother". Ben and I just looked at each other and asked "did she say BROTHER?" Of course she could just have been repeating something she heard at daycare or even the nursery at church. Then again, she could know something that the rest of us haven't figured out yet. LOL Out of the mouths of babes.

So, I guess to sum up my ramblings: We're not entirely certain that our family's complete.

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